Tuesday, 10 February 2009


My friend* Nudiemuse has a post up that just boggled my fucking brain.

The other day someone sent me an anonymous note letting me know how disappointed he/she was to find my blog linked at AAG (...) and Best Sex Bloggers (...) and a few other sex oriented places. This persons whole reasoning for the disappointed is that I a.) don't talk about exclusively sex and b.) am not "anyone" in the adult/sex industry.

This person was also disappointed to find out that I am fat and into FA.

Wait... let me make sure I'm getting this right. So because she's a whole person, who actually does things other than fuck and think about fucking, and she talks about it on her personal blog... there's something wrong with this?


I mean... I could understand if she was part of a porn site or something, where people would have to pay to have access to her blog, but it's her personal blog. It's out there in the ether, where people can either choose to read it or not. On top of that, I think it's really ridiculous that anybody should expect her (or any other blogger out there, regardless of the topic they write about) to conform her content just to please their expectations of what she should be writing about.

Personally, I like it when bloggers write about more than just one topic. It gives you a glimpse into the person behind the words - the real person. Not the body, but the person living inside that body. It helps to remind me that there's a real person behind those words, not just some automaton. I mean sure, if you're going to call yourself a sex blogger (just as an example), then I would definitely say that keeping the majority of your content to the topic at hand would be a good thing. But as Nudemuse points out, she's not JUST a sex blogger. She's not JUST a (insert topic here) blogger, period. She's just a blogger. And she's never claimed to be anything else.

And the whole fat/FA issue? Yeah. I guess this person would be disappointed in me, too, then. 'Cuz I'm just about as fat as Nudemuse is. And I pretty much agree with everything she's ever said on her blog about fat and FA. Does that make me a disappointment? Maybe, but then again, anybody who is going to be disappointed that a fat woman can find the sexiness in herself? That a person who happens to be a little bigger than some unreachable social "ideal" can love herself that much? Yeah, don't need 'em, don't want 'em. Couldn't care less about 'em, to be frank. I don't need a person like that in my life, online or otherwise. And neither does she. (And neither does anybody else, for that matter!)

I know, I know. Some of you may be thinking "this is the internet, honey, some people are like that." And you may be right, up to a point. But just because somebody chooses to be a dickwad doesn't mean I can't take offense to it. As I may have said before, my approach to the internet is... well, different. What you see here? This is me, just in text form. I don't pretend to be something or someone that I'm not. Unless you see a tag specifically labelled "fiction" or "fantasy island", what you're reading is me. Laid bare here for all to see. Sure, I hide behind a fake name**, but that's the ONLY thing fake about me here. And because I AM like that, I literally cannot comprehend why somebody would use the internet as a place to suddenly turn into an asshole. I understand that it happens; I just don't understand why somebody would do it. I don't see the point.

And, as you can see, it irks the FUCK out of me!

* - We actually are friends, in the internet sense. We know each other - and have done, for at least a year now, quite possibly more - from other corners of teh internetz, though I use a different name there than I do here. (Nudie, if you read this, and you want to know who I am, drop me a quick note [heavenly dot sinful dot blog at live dot co dot uk] and I'll be happy to out myself to ya. That is, if you haven't already guessed! ;) )

** - There's two reasons why I hide behind a totally fake (as in different than any other name I've ever used on teh internetz) name here: 1, I've had some unfortunate experiences with internet stalkers, and would rather just avoid a repeat of that experience at all costs. 2, the name I usually use? Not quite appropriate to the subject matter here. So I wanted something a little more on-topic anyway.


  1. You are delicious.

    And I will be emailing you shortly because I am breaking my brain trying to figure it out. I do love a mystery though.

  2. It is unfortunate we live in a world where people assume we must fit into their tiny little boxes. They say ignorance is bliss, but sometimes it's a bit tedious, isn't it? I've not yet gotten the courage to share myself with the world though blogging. But I deeply appreciate those of you who do. I vicariously enjoy your recounting of wonderful sex with hubby (post head massage), just as much as your righteous indignation at intolerant narrow-minded fools. Thanks for being you so sincerely,


  3. @Nudiemuse

    So are you, my dear! I'll await said email and confess all. ;)


    "intolerant narrow-minded fools" OMG, you couldn't have said it any better! That's EXACTLY what it is that gets to me.

  4. I find this is the one place I can be myself and not have to worry about what people think.

    Blogging is about having freedom of thought and speach and choosing to share with others.

    If they don't like what they read then they can move on.

    Be true to yourself.

  5. You were kind to respond to that persons ignorance with such well thought out words.


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